Verify InsuranceAnother wonderful story of redemption for episode 9 of A Reason to Live! Chef Krystal is our guest, sharing her story of addiction, recovery, and cooking fantastic feasts!
HEALING BEGINS WITH HOPE
Toll Free Call100% Confidential
Transcript
Aaron Reason:
Hey, guys. Welcome back to another episode of A Reason to Live. We got a really special guest today. First, I just want to thank all the supporters out there. Make sure you follow us on all the major platforms and share, share, share, can’t stress it enough. We’ve got Krystal, our chef here at the facility, on today for today’s episode. It’s going to be a great episode, we can’t wait. Thanks you guys.
Advert:
Located in Anderson, Indiana, Bridges of Hope is a detox and residential treatment facility, assisting those experiencing alcohol and substance abuse addiction. Our treatment philosophy is based on a comprehensive and integrated approach to addressing all issues related to substance abuse disorders and co-occurring mental health issues. Addiction treatment at Bridges of Hope can guide you safely through withdrawal from drugs and alcohol, and teach you important skills that help you achieve long-term recovery. Client care is our highest priority, and we offer our clients all-inclusive treatment services. Our ultimate goal is to identify the challenges, concerns and problems related to substance use and mental health disorders to provide professional clinical treatment to all of our patients. For more information on our services, visit us at bhoperehab.com or call (844) 449-6392.
Aaron Reason:
Hey guys, welcome back to another episode of A Reason to Live. I am your host, Aaron Reason, here with my producer, Michael Whitlock.
Michael Whitlock
How’s it going, everyone?
Aaron Reason:
And we have a special guest today, our good friend Krystal that works here at our facility with us.
Michael Whitlock
Chef Krystal.
Aaron Reason:
Chef Krystal, yeah. Yeah, let me not downplay her role here.
Michael Whitlock
Yeah, we need to keep her happy, because she keeps us happy.
Aaron Reason:
Yes, she keeps us well-fed here.
Chef Krystal:
Well, thank you.
Michael Whitlock
Also, the reason that people leave here looking a lot different than when they come in.
Aaron Reason:
Yes.
Michael Whitlock
They’ve put on a few pounds, but good pounds that they needed to put on.
Chef Krystal:
Healthy weight.
Aaron Reason:
Healthy weight. Yeah, absolutely. So Krystal, you’ve had your own struggles with addiction.
Chef Krystal:
Yes.
Aaron Reason:
You’re an overcomer. I love your story. I love seeing the way that you work with our clients, your interaction with them. You’re just an amazing soul. So I’m going to give you a chance to go ahead and just share what life was like for you in active addiction. So, we’ll kind of do it like we did mine. We’ll kind of go through the bad and then we’re going to end this on a good note, okay?
Chef Krystal:
Sounds good.
Aaron Reason:
All right.
Chef Krystal:
So at a young age, I was introduced to a lot of different drugs and alcohol. Most of my family is still in active addiction, so I thought it’s something normal. Then I got pregnant at a young age, so I was 15 when I had my first child, and by the age of 18 I had two children. So I dropped out of school and became a mom, and then I decided to start cooking. I was a chef at a five star restaurant. I thought everything was going great, and then my boys’ dad was really physically and mentally abusive. He ended up leaving and it was a struggle trying to be a single mum with two kids. So I ended up starting a drug and it came, about three months into it, I lost absolutely everything. I owned my own home, I had three cars and it was all gone.
I went to jail. I spent about 190 days in jail, got out and then I thought, “Okay, I’m going to try to change and do good.” Got on probation, that didn’t work. So as I fall deeper and deeper into my active addiction, I thought the best was move back to my hometown. So when I moved back to my hometown, about a month of me being there, I got a call that my house burnt down. And so me and my boys lost absolutely everything we owned. All I had was what fit in my little car.
So, I had to rebuild again and I fell back into addiction. I fell so hard that I lived at a house with no power, no food, no nothing, trying to take care of my kids. Thought I was trying to take care of them until CPS stepped in and they took my children from me.
At that time, I added another daughter, so I had three kids at the time, they took all of them. I ended up going to different rehabs and trying different things, nothing was working. I was thankful that my little brother and sister-in-law took my boys and my daughter’s dad took her.
I relapsed over, over, over again, in and out of hospitals, ended up losing everything again, living in my car, doing bad things with selling myself for drugs, doing whatever I can, stealing, just stuff that wasn’t me. To the point my kids didn’t want nothing to do with me.
Michael Whitlock
Do you feel like at that point you’re just kind of looking at yourself from … almost a ghost?
Chef Krystal:
Yes, absolutely.
Michael Whitlock
Looking in at yourself and you don’t recognize yourself anymore?
Chef Krystal:
Oh, yes. I mean, there’s times where I couldn’t even tell you my name I was so messed up, or I’d wake up in the middle of a cornfield just cold and not knowing what cornfield I’m at, and trying to figure out how to get out of it. I’ve been kidnapped by people and been put up in a house for a month at a time not knowing who I am, where I’m at, just so messed up with drugs. And I’m thankful I made it out alive.
Aaron Reason:
Yeah.
Chef Krystal:
Because it could have went totally wrong.
Michael Whitlock
One of my favorite things about this job is … and you’ve shared this with me a long time ago, is looking at pictures of people when they were in active addiction-
Aaron Reason:
Oh, yeah.
Michael Whitlock
And seeing what they look like now. And you’re a beautiful lady-
Chef Krystal:
Thank you.
Michael Whitlock
I love who you are, both inside and out, you got a great heart and you showed me some pictures of what you look like and you look like a different person, I almost didn’t recognize you.
Chef Krystal:
Aaron Reason:
Yeah.
Michael Whitlock
Same with you, I’ve seen some of your pictures.
Aaron Reason:
I looked like Gollum from Lord of Rings.
Michael Whitlock
I’ll keep my ring over here.
Aaron Reason:
When I got arrested, they didn’t even handcuff me, they brought me in on a leash. Got arrested by animal patrol.
Michael Whitlock
Yeah, I’ve seen pictures of you, and when you’re telling this story, it’s almost like I’m picturing this other person was going through this, not you.
Chef Krystal:
This 90 pound, had maybe 10 teeth in my mouth, sores all over. Yeah, it was-
Aaron Reason:
Did you notice that it always got worse?
Chef Krystal:
Absolutely.
Aaron Reason:
I remember I was in a meeting and this old guy, I felt like he was just staring at me and he shared, he said, “You know what? If you don’t think you’ve had it bad enough, then just go back out and use again, because it always gets worse.” It was like he cursed me, because every time from then on, it just progressively just got worse and worse.
Chef Krystal:
It never gets better.
Aaron Reason:
Yeah.
Michael Whitlock
If you’re ever having a bad day, do you ever look back at those pictures to help motivate you?
Chef Krystal:
All the time. All the time.
Michael Whitlock
You know what? My day isn’t so bad. Yeah.
Chef Krystal:
Yes.
Michael Whitlock
I was here and now I’m here.
Chef Krystal:
Yes.
Michael Whitlock
So, I would think that would be a great motivator and we’ve got a coworker that’s got pictures from when she was in active addiction in her office. And I’m sure she looks at those and sees who she once was and-
Chef Krystal:
Oh, yeah.
Michael Whitlock
So it’s pretty neat, I think, to be on the victory side of things versus where you were then.
Aaron Reason:
Absolutely. So, life was obviously horrible.
Chef Krystal:
It was rough, yes.
Aaron Reason:
What was that moment, did you have a moment where it was just like-
Chef Krystal:
I absolutely did.
Aaron Reason:
You know, you were brought to your meetings and-
Chef Krystal:
So I lost everything once again, probably 10th time. And I got in trouble, so I was in jail and I was withdrawing so bad. I was puking and shitting blood. I mean, it was just horrible. They ended up ORing me because I was so sick. And all I remember is crawling out of there and I crawled to the nearest halfway house that I used to go to, and they said I was banging on the door and they put me in a vehicle and drove me to the hospital.
As soon as I got in the hospital, I was admitted in ICU, not knowing if I was going to leave again. And I stayed there for weeks just in ICU and I remember waking up with tubes out of me and all these things all over me and wires coming, not knowing like, is this it? Am I ever going to see my kids again? That was the main thing. And I knew then something has to change because if not, I’m going to be dead.
Michael Whitlock
Are you comfortable sharing what drugs you were taking at the time?
Chef Krystal:
Absolutely. Meth and the big thing was spice katie, there’s different terms for it, it’s supposed to be like a synthetic marijuana. It is definitely not. And it about took my life. It was horrible.
Aaron Reason:
Yeah.
Michael Whitlock
And you hear that meth is everywhere and it’s really quite scary, the effects that it has on the body, just tearing it down while making you … withdrawal, an addiction to this substance, craving it more and then it also has an impact on mental health.
Chef Krystal:
Absolutely.
Michael Whitlock
And can lead to some psychosis that … it’s just so scary.
Chef Krystal:
It’s so scary. I mean, I remember just being up for almost 10 days, not knowing who I am, where I’m at. People say they would see me at a gas station and I was just like a zombie. And I’m just thankful that on the road, driving or anything, I did not harm anybody else.
Aaron Reason:
Right.
Chef Krystal:
Because I don’t remember what I did in them 10 days. And it wasn’t just one time, I did it over and over and over again. I would see things and hear things that wasn’t there and harm other people because I thought they were coming after me or tearing up my whole home thinking there’s stuff in the walls, and I did a lot of crazy stuff on it.
Aaron Reason:
I led myself on a high speed chase once. I wasn’t being chased, I just led myself on one.
Chef Krystal:
You thought you was.
Aaron Reason:
I thought there was some cops after me.
Chef Krystal:
Yeah.
Aaron Reason:
I ran like there was and it was on like a Wednesday afternoon.
Michael Whitlock
Wow.
Aaron Reason:
Yeah.
Chef Krystal:
And it’s so surreal. I mean, you really think that stuff’s happening at that point in time.
Aaron Reason:
Yeah, yeah. It seems very, very realistic. Okay well, we’re going to take a quick break and get a word in from our sponsors, and then when we come back we’ll talk about your journey here and your journey back to the good side.
Chef Krystal:
Sounds good.
Michael Whitlock
Great.
Advert: At the Indiana Community Addiction Network, we offer the new standard and medication assisted treatment. So if you’re ready to put substance abuse behind you, we’re here to help. We are a local family-owned center who will create an individualized physician led care plan to help you reach sobriety. At ICAN, we treat your addiction based on your unique needs and have full addiction treatment programs. Get started on recovery today. Call ICAN now to speak to an advisor at (888) 635-1470 or visit us at addictionsnetwork.com.
Aaron Reason:
Okay. So you talked a little bit about, so you’re at the halfway house now and they took you to the hospital and you’re in ICU. So kind of take us from that point forward and how you ended up here.
Chef Krystal:
So I ended up getting better in ICU and I went back to the halfway house and I was 14 days clean. And it just … that place wasn’t for me, which is okay, not every place is for everybody so I left there scared, but I knew I just had to do something else. So I went to my fiance now, and he got me into community hospital because I was feeling suicidal and just lost, what do I do now? Here I’m clean and I don’t know where to turn. So they sent me to another hospital and from there they were gracious enough to find me another rehab, but it was like an hour and a half away and I wasn’t used to it, but I knew it was probably for the best. So they actually, my family was done. Nobody … they said, “You figure it out. You want to go there? Figure out how to get there.”
Michael Whitlock
I think something I want to add here is, I think it’s important that there’s a little distance between your comfortable life and the facility you’re going to. Because I think people, if they live in that community, a lot of times it’s just easy for them to leave when times get tough.
Chef Krystal:
Absolutely.
Michael Whitlock
So I think it’s a good thing when people have to travel a little bit of distance.
Chef Krystal:
Yes, absolutely. Because you’re going to a place that you’re not familiar with. You don’t know nobody, you don’t know nothing, it’s you. So you’ve got to figure it out. And the hospital I was at paid for my bus ticket-
Michael Whitlock
Oh, cool.
Chef Krystal:
All the way. And I was so scared, I’ve never rode a bus like that. They couldn’t find my clothes or anything, so I had some donation clothes on with some flip-flops and a brown paper bag. And I remember just sitting there and I got to the bus station and this guy comes to pick me up and I’m like, is this the guy that’s supposed to be picking me up? I’m so nervous. And me arriving, I’m like, here we go. And that started my journey to where I’m at now.
Michael Whitlock
So that’s when it finally clicked for you.
Chef Krystal:
Yes.
Michael Whitlock
It was time to take it serious.
Chef Krystal:
Yes.
Michael Whitlock
And you started applying all the tools and-
Chef Krystal:
Absolutely.
Michael Whitlock
Putting in the work, we’ve talked about putting in the work.
Chef Krystal:
And even though I was there, my family’s still, “Sorry, I don’t want nothing to do with you.” And my little brother and sister-in-law said, “Look, you could talk to the boys when you’re six months clean. Until then, I’m sorry.” And I get it now. At first I was mad. I was like, why are you doing this to me? I’m trying this time. Well, how many times did you try before? So I had a lot of resentment against them and now I understand why they did what they did.
Aaron Reason:
And I mean, we’ve lost that trust right?
Chef Krystal:
Absolutely.
Aaron Reason:
The one thing that I learned in my recovery journey this time is because I’d told my family so many times before how it was going to be different. And this time the words didn’t really matter until the actions aligned with what I was saying.
Chef Krystal:
Absolutely.
Aaron Reason:
And it was really all about my actions from that point. And then once they saw that and they saw that it was real this time, everybody embraced me again with open arms.
Michael Whitlock
It’s where I think the saying, tough love comes into play. People love you enough to make things kind of difficult for you because you need those obstacles and those rules and boundaries. Can we talk a little bit about my favorite part of the day and that is the meal creation by Chef Krystal.
Chef Krystal:
Alright. So I am the chef here at our facility and I absolutely love it. Not only do I get to cook good meals for everybody, but I get to be a little part of each one’s recovery that walks in here, even if it’s just food or I get to tell them little bits and pieces of my story to try to help them, watch them walk in here with no weight on them. And then they walk out like, “Look at all this weight I’ve gained.” It means everything to me. I try to cook them a home cooked meal. I’m big on that. A lot of places, they’re not used to having a good home cooked meal that I feel like they missed out on it, because I know I did. There’s times I didn’t eat for weeks. So it’s like if I could just give them that one good meal and feed their bellies.
Michael Whitlock
Well, so one of the favorite things about you for me is around different holidays, you go above and beyond at Christmas, New Years, Thanksgiving, Easter. Even the Super Bowl.
Aaron Reason:
Let’s not forget the Super Bowl. Because you went all out on the Super Bowl.
Michael Whitlock
And in fact, there’s a lot of holidays that you give up time with your family and you’re here at the facility loving on our patients. I see the spreads. I think maybe I need to come into work on those days and good night, it’s not just another meal for you.
Chef Krystal:
No.
Michael Whitlock
You put in a lot of love and effort and make sure that these people that are struggling and probably wanting to leave.
Chef Krystal:
Yes.
Michael Whitlock
Because holidays are tough for people.
Chef Krystal:
Very.
Michael Whitlock
They’re missing their family, they’re realizing that they’re missing out on memories and you’re making that day special for them. And so we have something we call community meeting every Monday morning where we talk about what’s going well, what’s not going well. And the community meeting after a big holiday or event, everybody’s glowing.
Aaron Reason:
Oh, yeah.
Michael Whitlock
Chef Krystal made our weekend. She went above and beyond. We don’t have people leaving AMA like you would expect during those days. I think this is a big part of it, is that love and food.
Aaron Reason:
Absolutely.
Chef Krystal:
And they know I put in… I want them to feel special and just know that it’s okay that you’re in a place like this and it’s a holiday. I try to show them that no matter what … I lost track.
Michael Whitlock
It’s all good.
Chef Krystal:
I’m so nervous.
Michael Whitlock
No worries.
Chef Krystal:
So I just want them to know that no matter what, this is the best place for them to be during that time. I’ve been in a lot of places during holidays and stuff that I missed out and I wanted to leave. I know what it was wanting to leave and I don’t want to see them throw everything at their work for however many days because it’s a holiday.
Michael Whitlock
Well, so holidays, we see two types of people. We have some people that come in because they know they need protection during the holidays, right?
Chef Krystal:
Yes, yes.
Michael Whitlock
And they are going to be tempted and want to be in a place where they aren’t going to have access to their drug of choice or alcohol. And then we have the people that come in after the holidays because they want one last hurrah, which is dangerous thinking.
Chef Krystal:
Yeah.
Michael Whitlock
Because they’re going to try and live it up and then they’re going to come in and get help. So we usually see an influx of people right before a holiday and right after a holiday.
Chef Krystal:
Yes.
Michael Whitlock
We’re just thankful that you’re here to give them that extra… I guess you give us a competitive edge by giving them the love and the soul food, the warm mashed potatoes, all the things.
Chef Krystal:
And I like to do stuff around the holidays, like if it’s decorating cookies or doing caramel apple bar or-
Aaron Reason:
The sundae bars, let’s not forget about the ice cream sundaes.
Chef Krystal:
The ice cream sundae bars, or Easter just passed recently and I like to dye eggs with them. And a lot of them like, “Ah, I don’t know about that,” until they start doing it. And I’ll never forget this particular Easter, and one looked at me and he did not want to do it. And he started and he said, “Thank you, because this reminds me of what I used to do with my grandmother,” and that’s all I want. I want them to bring all them special good memories when we wasn’t out there using. And that’s what it’s about, showing that we can still do these quirky little things and have fun.
Aaron Reason:
It’s almost-
Michael Whitlock
Like you’re sober.
Aaron Reason:
It’s almost like, yeah, getting back to being normal. And I think that that was a fear that I had. It’s something that I’d always thought about was what am I going to be sober? Am I really going to be happy? And I am blown away by the joy that’s in my heart now. And how long do you have sober now, Krystal?
Chef Krystal:
June 20th of this year, I will have six years, it’s coming up, next month.
Aaron Reason:
Next month, six years.
Michael Whitlock
That’s great.
Aaron Reason:
Come on, man.
Michael Whitlock
And we get to celebrate your soberversary. I love it. Everybody, we had signs, I think last year.
Chef Krystal:
You did. I walked into signs, cards made by the clients, I mean the whole cafeteria decorated.
Michael Whitlock
It was your big milestone, your five years.
Chef Krystal:
Yes, and it was amazing, definitely made me feel special.
Aaron Reason:
I want to touch on too, there’s been times when you and I have been on shift and maybe somebody called off or something. And I’m so grateful that you’re here because-
Chef Krystal:
Thank you.
Aaron Reason:
I don’t even have to ask, you just naturally jump in and start helping and you do the work as a tech and help us out tremendously all the time. So you go above and beyond here and I think that’s what it’s all about. And honestly, for an addict that’s coming in here, especially us that are in recovery, I feel like we set the example for them, right?
Chef Krystal:
Oh, yes.
Aaron Reason:
So if I’m representing what my recovery looks like, I want to be on time to my job, I want to enjoy my job, I want to help others. And I see you model that to them and I love that about you.
Chef Krystal:
Thank you.
Michael Whitlock
And let’s not forget, she just won the Chilli Cook Off.
Aaron Reason:
She won the Chilli Cook Off.
Michael Whitlock
So I don’t know how many people were present in entries, but-
Chef Krystal:
There was a lot.
Aaron Reason:
There was a lot. The Chilli Cook Off is a big thing around here.
Michael Whitlock
Several organizations and this is a recovery based event. And our very own Chef Krystal, champion of the Chilli Cook Off.
Aaron Reason:
I joke around that it’s like the Catalina Wine Mixer of the recovering addicts out here so yeah.
Michael Whitlock
And that just shows that she’s doing… I mean, that’s above and beyond her job duties. She’s representing Bridges, but it’s also an event where she’s giving some of her time.
Aaron Reason:
Absolutely.
Michael Whitlock
So we’re very thankful.
Chef Krystal:
Thank you.
Michael Whitlock
Yeah.
Aaron Reason:
Well, Krystal, I really appreciate you. I know everybody here appreciates you.
Chef Krystal:
Thank you.
Aaron Reason:
You’re a very special person in my life. I’m so glad that God put you in my life.
Chef Krystal:
Thank you.
Aaron Reason:
And thanks for feeding us well.
Michael Whitlock
Same, for sure. All right, thanks. Have a good day.
Michael Whitlock
I am very thankful to have Chef Krystal come into our studio and share her story of tragedy turning into redemption. And she is such a warm, beautiful soul that we are blessed to have. So again, thank you to Chef Krystal for visiting, and thank you to Bridges of Hope and Indiana Community Addiction Network for allowing us week in and week out to bring our stories to the audiences, and hopefully we’re saving some lives and sharing some redemption that lets people know that their stories can turn around, that it’s not written yet. Have a great day, and until next time.